little dorrit-信丽(英文版)-第74章

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intentions　to　be　always　a　sacrifice；　farewell；　find　another　worthy　of
you；　and　forget　me！〃　This　is　the　way　in　which　she　is　doomed　to　be　a
constant　slave　to　them　that　are　not　worthy　that　a　constant　slave　she
unto　them　should　be。　This　is　the　way　in　which　Our　John　has　e　to　find
no　pleasure　but　in　taking　cold　among　the　linen；　and　in　showing　in　that
yard；　as　in　that　yard　I　have　myself　shown　you；　a　broken…down　ruin　that
goes　home　to　his　mother's　heart！'　Here　the　good　woman　pointed　to　the
little　window；　whence　her　son　might　be　seen　sitting　disconsolate　in
the　tuneless　groves；　and　again　shook　her　head　and　wiped　her　eyes；　and
besought　him；　for　the　united　sakes　of　both　the　young　people；　to　exercise
his　influence　towards　the　bright　reversal　of　these　dismal　events。

She　was　so　confident　in　her　exposition　of　the　case；　and　it　was　so
undeniably　founded　on　correct　premises　in　so　far　as　the　relative
positions　of　Little　Dorrit　and　her　family　were　concerned；　that　Clennam
could　not　feel　positive　on　the　other　side。　He　had　e　to　attach　to
Little　Dorrit　an　interest　so　peculiar……an　interest　that　removed　her
from；　while　it　grew　out　of；　the　mon　and　coarse　things　surrounding
her……that　he　found　it　disappointing；　disagreeable；　almost　painful；　to
suppose　her　in　love　with　young　Mr　Chivery　in　the　back…yard；　or　any　such
person。　On　the　other　hand；　he　reasoned　with　himself　that　she　was　just
as　good　and　just　as　true　in　love　with　him；　as　not　in　love　with　him；
and　that　to　make　a　kind　of　domesticated　fairy　of　her；　on　the　penalty
of　isolation　at　heart　from　the　only　people　she　knew；　would　be　but　a
weakness　of　his　own　fancy；　and　not　a　kind　one。　Still；　her　youthful　and
ethereal　appearance；　her　timid　manner；　the　charm　of　her　sensitive　voice
and　eyes；　the　very　many　respects　in　which　she　had　interested　him　out
of　her　own　individuality；　and　the　strong　difference　between　herself　and
those　about　her；　were　not　in　unison；　and　were　determined　not　to　be　in
unison；　with　this　newly　presented　idea。

He　told　the　worthy　Mrs　Chivery；　after　turning　these　things　over　in　his
mind……he　did　that；　indeed；　while　she　was　yet　speaking……that　he　might　be
relied　upon　to　do　his　utmost　at　all　times　to　promote　the　happiness　of
Miss　Dorrit；　and　to　further　the　wishes　of　her　heart　if　it　were　in　his
power　to　do　so；　and　if　he　could　discover　what　they　were。　At　the　same
time　he　cautioned　her　against　assumptions　and　appearances；　enjoined
strict　silence　and　secrecy；　lest　Miss　Dorrit　should　be　made　unhappy；　and
particularly　advised　her　to　endeavour　to　win　her　son's　confidence　and　so
to　make　quite　sure　of　the　state　of　the　case。　Mrs　Chivery　considered　the
latter　precaution　superfluous；　but　said　she　would　try。　She　shook　her
head　as　if　she　had　not　derived　all　the　fort　she　had　fondly　expected
from　this　interview；　but　thanked　him　nevertheless　for　the　trouble　he　had
kindly　taken。　They　then　parted　good　friends；　and　Arthur　walked　away。

The　crowd　in　the　street　jostling　the　crowd　in　his　mind；　and　the　two
crowds　making　a　confusion；　he　avoided　London　Bridge；　and　turned　off　in
the　quieter　direction　of　the　Iron　Bridge。　He　had　scarcely　set　foot　upon
it；　when　he　saw　Little　Dorrit　walking　on　before　him。　It　was　a　pleasant
day；　with　a　light　breeze　blowing；　and　she　seemed　to　have　that　minute
e　there　for　air。　He　had　left　her　in　her　father's　room　within　an　hour。

It　was　a　timely　chance；　favourable　to　his　wish　of　observing　her　face
and　manner　when　no　one　else　was　by。　He　quickened　his　pace；　but　before　he
reached　her；　she　turned　her　head。

'Have　I　startled　you？'　he　asked。

'I　thought　I　knew　the　step；'　she　answered；　hesitating。

'And　did　you　know　it；　Little　Dorrit？　You　could　hardly　have　expected
mine。'

'I　did　not　expect　any。　But　when　I　heard　a　step；　I　thought　it……sounded
like　yours。'

'Are　you　going　further？'

'No；　sir；　I　am　only　walking　her　for　a　little　change。'

They　walked　together；　and　she　recovered　her　confiding　manner　with　him；
and　looked　up　in　his　face　as　she　said；　after　glancing　around：

'It　is　so　strange。　Perhaps　you　can　hardly　understand　it。　I　sometimes
have　a　sensation　as　if　it　was　almost　unfeeling　to　walk　here。'

'Unfeeling？'

'To　see　the　river；　and　so　much　sky；　and　so　many　objects；　and　such　change
and　motion。　Then　to　go　back；　you　know；　and　find　him　in　the　same　cramped
place。'

'Ah　yes！　But　going　back；　you　must　remember　that　you　take　with　you　the
spirit　and　influence　of　such　things　to　cheer　him。'

'Do　I？　I　hope　I　may！　I　am　afraid　you　fancy　too　much；　sir；　and　make　me
out　too　powerful。　If　you　were　in　prison；　could　I　bring　such　fort　to
you？'　'Yes；　Little　Dorrit；　I　am　sure　of　it。'

He　gathered　from　a　tremor　on　her　lip；　and　a　passing　shadow　of　great
agitation　on　her　face；　that　her　mind　was　with　her　father。　He　remained
silent　for　a　few　moments；　that　she　might　regain　her　posure。　The
Little　Dorrit；　trembling　on　his　arm；　was　less　in　unison　than　ever　with
Mrs　Chivery's　theory；　and　yet　was　not　irreconcilable　with　a　new　fancy
which　sprung　up　within　him；　that　there　might　be　some　one　else　in　the
hopeless……newer　fancy　still……in　the　hopeless　unattainable　distance。

They　turned；　and　Clennam　said；　Here　was　Maggy　ing！　Little　Dorrit
looked　up；　surprised；　and　they　confronted　Maggy；　who　brought　herself
at　sight　of　them　to　a　dead　stop。　She　had　been　trotting　along；　so
preoccupied　and　busy　that　she　had　not　recognised　them　until　they　turned
upon　her。　She　was　now　in　a　moment　so　conscience…stricken　that　her　very
basket　partook　of　the　change。

'Maggy；　you　promised　me　to　stop　near　father。'

'So　I　would；　Little　Mother；　only　he　wouldn't　let　me。　If　he　takes　and
sends　me　out　I　must　go。　If　he　takes　and　says；　〃Maggy；　you　hurry　away　and
back　with　that　letter；　and　you　shall　have　a　sixpence　if　the　answer's　a
good　'un；〃　I　must　take　it。　Lor；　Little　Mother；　what's　a　poor　thing　of
ten　year　old　to　do？　And　if　Mr　Tip……if　he　happens　to　be　a　ing　in　as
I　e　out；　and　if　he　says　〃Where　are　you　going；　Maggy？〃　and　if　I　says；
〃I'm　a　going　So　and　So；〃　and　if　he　says；　〃I'll　have　a　Try　too；〃　and　if
he　goes　into　the　George　and　writes　a　letter　and　if　he　gives　it　me　and
says；　〃Take　that　one　to　the　same　place；　and　if　the　answer's　a　good　'un
I'll　give　you　a　shilling；〃　it　ain't　my　fault；　mother！'

Arthur　read；　in　Little　Dorrit's　downcast　eyes；　to　whom　she　foresaw　that
the　letters　were　addressed。

'I'm　a　going　So　and　So。　There！　That's　where　I　am　a　going　to；'　said
Maggy。　'I'm　a　going　So　and　So。　It　ain't　you；　Little　Mother；　that's　got
anything　to　do　with　it……it's　you；　you　know；'　said　Maggy；　addressing
Arthur。　'You'd　better　e；　So　and　So；　and　let　me　take　and　give　'em　to
you。'

'We　will　not　be　so　particular　as　that；　Maggy。　Give　them　me　here；'　said
Clennam　in　a　low　voice。

'Well；　then；　e　across　the　road；'　answered　Maggy　in　a　very　loud
whisper。　'Little　Mother　wasn't　to　know　nothing　of　it；　and　she　would
never　have　known　nothing　of　it　if　you　had　only　gone　So　and　So；　instead
of　bothering　and　loitering　about。　It　ain't　my　fault。　I　must　do　what　I　am
told。　They　ought　to　be　ashamed　of　themselves　for　telling　me。'

Clennam　crossed　to　the　other　side；　and　hurriedly　opened　the　letters。
That　from　the　father　mentioned　that　most　unexpectedly　finding　himself　in
the　novel　position　of　having　been　disappointed　of　a　remittance　from
the　City　on　which　he　had　confidently　counted；　he　took　up　his　pen；　being
restrained　by　the　unhappy　circumstance　of　his　incarceration　during
three…and…twenty　years　（doubly　underlined）；　from　ing　himself；　as
he　would　otherwise　certainly　have　done……took　up　his　pen　to　entreat　Mr
Clennam　to　advance　him　the　sum　of　Three　Pounds　Ten　Shillings　upon　his
I。O。U。；　which　he　begged　to　enclose。　That　from　the　son　set　forth　that
Mr　Clennam　would；　he　knew；　be　gratified　to　hear　that　he　had　at
length　obtained　permanent　employment　of　a　highly　satisfactory　nature；
acpanied　with　every　prospect　of　plete　success　in　life；　but　that
the　temporary　inability　of　his　employer　to　pay　him　his　arrears　of　salary
to　that　date　（in　which　condition　said　employer　had　appealed　to　that
generous　forbearance　in　which　he　trusted　he　should　never　be　wanting
towards　a　fellow…creature）；　bined　with　the　fraudulent　conduct　of　a
false　friend　and　the　present　high　price　of　provisions；　had　reduced
him　to