四季随笔-the private papers of henry ryecroft(英文版)-第12章

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But　there　is　the　rustle　of　branches　in　the　morning　breeze；　there　is　the　music　of　a　sunny　shower　against　the　window；　there　is　the　matin　song　of　birds。　Several　times　lately　I　have　lain　wakeful　when　there　sounded　the　first　note　of　the　earliest　lark；　it　makes　me　almost　glad　of　my　restless　nights。　The　only　trouble　that　touches　me　in　these　moments　is　the　thought　of　my　long　life　wasted　amid　the　senseless　noises　of　man's　world。　Year　after　year　this　spot　has　known　the　same　tranquillity；　with　ever　so　little　of　good　fortune；　with　ever　so　little　wisdom；　beyond　what　was　granted　me；　I　might　have　blessed　my　manhood　with　calm；　might　have　made　for　myself　in　later　life　a　long　retrospect　of　bowered　peace。　As　it　is；　I　enjoy　with　something　of　sadness；　remembering　that　this　melodious　silence　is　but　the　prelude　of　that　deeper　stillness　which　waits　to　enfold　us　all。
XXIV
Morning　after　morning；　of　late；　I　have　taken　my　walk　in　the　same　direction；　my　purpose　being　to　look　at　a　plantation　of　young　larches。　There　is　no　lovelier　colour　on　earth　than　that　in　which　they　are　now　clad；　it　seems　to　refresh　as　well　as　gladden　my　eyes；　and　its　influence　sinks　deep　into　my　heart。　Too　soon　it　will　change；　already　I　think　the　first　radiant　verdure　has　begun　to　pass　into　summer's　soberness。　The　larch　has　its　moment　of　unmatched　beauty……and　well　for　him　whose　chance　permits　him　to　enjoy　it；　spring　after　spring。
Could　anything　be　more　wonderful　than　the　fact　that　here　am　I；　day　by　day；　not　only　at　leisure　to　walk　forth　and　gaze　at　the　larches；　but　blessed　ind　needful　for　such　enjoyment？　On　any　morning　of　spring　sunshine；　how　many　mortals　find　themselves　so　much　at　peace　that　they　are　able　to　give　themselves　wholly　to　delight　in　the　glory　of　heaven　and　of　earth？　Is　it　the　case　with　one　man　in　every　fifty　thousand？　Consider　what　extraordinary　kindness　of　fate　must　tend　upon　one；　that　not　a　care；　not　a　preoccupation；　should　interfere　with　his　contemplative　thought　for　five　or　six　days　successively！　So　rooted　in　the　human　mind　（and　so　reasonably　rooted）　is　the　belief　in　an　Envious　Power；　that　I　ask　myself　whether　I　shall　not　have　to　pay；　by　some　disaster；　for　this　period　of　sacred　calm。　For　a　week　or　so　I　have　been　one　of　a　small　number；　chosen　out　of　the　whole　human　race　by　fate's　supreme　benediction。　It　may　be　that　this　es　to　every　one　in　turn；　to　most；　it　can　only　be　once　in　a　lifetime；　and　so　briefly。　That　my　own　lot　seems　so　much　better　than　that　of　ordinary　men；　sometimes　makes　me　fearful。
XXV
Walking　in　a　favourite　lane　to…day；　I　found　it　covered　with　shed　blossoms　of　the　hawthorn。　Creamy　white；　fragrant　even　in　ruin；　lay　scattered　the　glory　of　the　May。　It　told　me　that　spring　is　over。
Have　I　enjoyed　it　as　I　should？　Since　the　day　that　brought　me　freedom；　four　times　have　I　seen　the　year's　new　birth；　and　always；　as　the　violet　yielded　to　the　rose；　I　have　known　a　fear　that　I　had　not　sufficiently　prized　this　boon　of　heaven　whilst　it　was　with　me。　Many　hours　I　have　spent　shut　up　among　my　books；　when　I　might　have　been　in　the　meadows。　Was　the　gain　equivalent？　Doubtfully；　diffidently；　I　hearken　what　the　mind　can　plead。
I　recall　my　moments　of　delight；　the　recognition　of　each　flower　that　unfolded；　the　surprise　of　budding　branches　clothed　in　a　night　with　green。　The　first　snowy　gleam　upon　the　blackthorn　did　not　escape　me。　By　its　familiar　bank；　I　watched　for　the　earliest　primrose；　and　in　its　copse　I　found　the　anemone。　Meadows　shining　with　buttercups；　hollows　sunned　with　the　marsh　marigold　held　me　long　at　gaze。　I　saw　the　sallow　glistening　with　its　cones　of　silvery　fur；　and　splendid　with　dust　of　gold。　These　mon　things　touch　me　with　more　of　admiration　and　of　wonder　each　time　I　behold　them。　They　are　once　more　gone。　As　I　turn　to　summer；　a　misgiving　mingles　with　my　joy。

SUMMER　

I　
To…day；　as　I　was　reading　in　the　garden；　a　waft　of　summer　perfume……　some　hidden　link　of　association　in　what　I　read……I　know　not　what　it　may　have　been……took　me　back　to　schoolboy　holidays；　I　recovered　with　strange　intensity　that　lightsome　mood　of　long　release　from　tasks；　of　going　away　to　the　seaside；　which　is　one　of　childhood's　blessings。　I　was　in　the　train；　no　rushing　express；　such　as　bears　you　great　distances；　the　sober　train　which　goes　to　no　place　of　importance；　which　lets　you　see　the　white　steam　of　the　engine　float　and　fall　upon　a　meadow　ere　you　pass。　Thanks　to　a　good　and　wise　father；　we　youngsters　saw　nothing　of　seaside　places　where　crowds　assemble；　I　am　speaking；　too；　of　a　time　more　than　forty　years　ago；　when　it　was　still　possible　to　find　on　the　coasts　of　northern　England；　east　or　west；　spots　known　only　to　those　who　loved　the　shore　for　its　beauty　and　its　solitude。　At　every　station　the　train　stopped；　little　stations；　decked　with　beds　of　flowers；　smelling　warm　in　the　sunshine　where　country…folk　got　in　with　baskets；　and　talked　in　an　unfamiliar　dialect；　an　English　which　to　us　sounded　almost　like　a　foreign　tongue。　Then　the　first　glimpse　of　the　sea；　the　excitement　of　noting　whether　tide　was　high　or　low……stretches　of　sand　and　weedy　pools；　or　halcyon　wavelets　frothing　at　their　furthest　reach；　under　the　sea…　banks　starred　with　convolvulus。　Of　a　sudden；　OUR　station！
Ah；　that　taste　of　the　brine　on　a　child's　lips！　Nowadays；　I　can　take　holiday　when　I　will；　and　go　whithersoever　it　pleases　me；　but　that　salt　kiss　of　the　sea　air　I　shall　never　know　again。　My　senses　are　dulled；　I　cannot　get　so　near　to　Nature；　I　have　a　sorry　dread　of　her　clouds；　her　winds；　and　must　walk　with　tedious　circumspection　where　once　I　ran　and　leapt　exultingly。　Were　it　possible；　but　for　one　half…hour；　to　plunge　and　bask　in　the　sunny　surf；　to　roll　on　the　silvery　sand…hills；　to　leap　from　rock　to　rock　on　shining　sea…ferns；　laughing　if　I　slipped　into　the　shallows　among　starfish　and　anemones！　I　am　much　older　in　body　than　in　mind；　I　can　but　look　at　what　I　once　enjoyed。
II
I　have　been　spending　a　week　in　Somerset。　The　right　June　weather　put　me　in　the　mind　for　rambling；　and　my　thoughts　turned　to　the　Severn　Sea。　I　went　to　Glastonbury　and　Wells；　and　on　to　Cheddar；　and　so　to　the　shore　of　the　Channel　at　Clevedon；　remembering　my　holiday　of　fifteen　years　ago；　and　too　often　losing　myself　in　a　contrast　of　the　man　I　was　then　and　what　I　am　now。　Beautiful　beyond　all　words　of　description　that　nook　of　oldest　England；　but　that　I　feared　the　moist　and　misty　winter　climate；　I　should　have　chosen　some　spot　below　the　Mendips　for　my　home　and　resting…place。　Unspeakable　the　charm　to　my　ear　of　those　old　names；　exquisite　the　quiet　of　those　little　towns；　lost　amid　tilth　and　pasture；　untouched　as　yet　by　the　fury　of　modern　life；　their　ancient　sanctuaries　guarded；　as　it　were；　by　noble　trees　and　hedges　overrun　with　flowers。　In　all　England　there　is　no　sweeter　and　more　varied　prospect　than　that　from　the　hill　of　the　Holy　Thorn　at　Glastonbury；　in　all　England　there　is　no　lovelier　musing　place　than　the　leafy　walk　beside　the　Palace　Moat　at　Wells。　As　I　think　of　the　golden　hours　I　spent　there；　a　passion　to　which　I　can　give　no　name　takes　hold　upon　me；　my　heart　trembles　with　an　indefinable　ecstasy。
There　was　a　time　of　my　life　when　I　was　consumed　with　a　desire　for　foreign　travel；　an　impatience　of　everything　familiar　fretted　me　through　all　the　changing　year。　If　I　had　not　at　length　found　the　opportunity　to　escape；　if　I　had　not　seen　the　landscapes　for　which　my　soul　longed；　I　think　I　must　have　moped　to　death。　Few　men；　assuredly；　have　enjoyed　such　wanderings　more　than　I；　and　few　men　revive　them　in　memory　with　a　richer　delight　or　deeper　longing。　But…　…whatever　temptation　es　to　me　in　mellow　autumn；　when　I　think　of　the　grape　and　of　the　olive……I　do　not　believe　I　shall　ever　again　cross　the　sea。　What　remains　to　me　of　life　and　of　energy　is　far　too　little　for　the　enjoyment　of　all　I　know；　and　all　I　wish　to　know；　of　this　dear　island。
As　a　child　I　used　to　sleep　in　a　room　hung　round　with　prints　after　English　landscape　painters……those　steel　engravings　so　mon　half　a　century　ago；　which　bore　the　legend；　〃From　the　picture　in　the　Vernon　Gallery。〃　Far　more　than　I　knew　at　the　time；　these　pictures　impressed　me；　I　gazed　and　gazed　at　them；　with　that　fixed　attention　of　a　child　which　is　half　curiosity；　half　reverie；　till　every　line　of　them　was　fixed　in　my　mind；　at　this　moment　I　see　the　black…and…white　landscapes　as　if　the